Fighting for my Joy

 I haven't posted in a long while, because there was a long stretch in which I couldn't find anything that suited the title of my blog to write about.  

It was a long season of drought.  Both for the state of Texas, and my own spirit.  Although Texas may still be in the midst of a drought, God sent along some wonderful friends, mentors, and guides to love and nourish my heart until I finally feel like I'm coming out the other side of the desert.  There have definitely been some rainy days full of blessings pouring down!  

Some of them have been in relation to a study I'm doing.  One of my friends suggested I might be going through so much because I'm being attacked spiritually.  I could see her point, but that means I'm in the midst of a battle I didn't even know was raging around me!  So I decided to study about our spiritual warfare.  

What is our protection?  What armor do we have? 

What are our weapons?  Can we fight back? 

What is our battle strategy?  Can we make an actual plan against an enemy we cannot see?

Who is our enemy?  Who or what are we actually fighting?  How can I know my enemy so I'm aware of what tricks may come along?  

Ephesians 6:10-18

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.  Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.  For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.  Therefore, put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evili comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.  Staqnd firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.  In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with shich you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.  Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.  And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.  With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord's people.  (NIV)

We are commanded to put on ALL the armor of God - not so we can fight each other.  Not so we can fight unbelievers.  But so we can fight against demonic and Satanic forces ruling our world.  Are we really ready to get into the battle and really learn about our enemy, learn about our armor and our weapons, and even more importantly, learn not just how to fight, but how to WIN our battles?  I am certainly tired of constantly being the one attacked, constantly being on the defensive, constantly being hit, attacked, and beat down by the enemy.  So, Step 1, then, is getting ready for the battle, putting on some armor!  

• The Belt of Truth - Well, why a belt?  That was my first thought.  Wouldn't chainmail be the first thing a warrior would need?  What on earth is a belt going to protect??  So, Google queen that I am, I looked it up.  Picture an ancient Roman.  Ceasar, townsfolk, Alexander the Great, whoever you want.  You're picturing a long, dress-like robe, or possibly a knee length garment, gathered at the waist with some sort of belt, right?  Well, that long, flowy robe would get in the way of daily duties. It's hard to milk a cow, or harvest your grain, or run after a wayward sheep when you keep tripping over your robe, isn't it?  So they would grab the hem of the back of the robe, pull it forward, between their legs, and over the front of the robe, and tuck it into their belt.  This would keep the robe out of the way of their daily duties, so they could get done what they needed to do.  What does this have to do with armor?  I'm glad you asked!  What, in our lives, is in the way of us being truly effective for God?  We use TRUTH to get those things under control and out of the way for what God wants for us.  Satan is the father of lies, so it is especially important to base everything we do, and every battle we fight on the truth of God's word.  And the belt of truth helps us keep the lies and distractions out of the way while we fight.  
• The Breastplate of Righteousness - Again, back to my ancient Roman research.  The breastplate protects your heart and organs.  That makes sense that it's important to have our breastplate on.  But why righteousness?  What is it about the breastplate that represents righteousness?  Well, righteousness is how we live, our standing before God.  If we live in right standing with God, careful that nothing comes between us and our God, our breastplate of righteousness will protect our hearts when Satan tries to hit us with things that would take our heart away from God.  
• Feet shod with the Gospel of Peace - The word gospel means 'good news'.  Our feet are to be covered with the good news of peace.  Any armor that has to do with peace seems odd for a warrior.  Isn't a battle kind of the opposite of peace?  Maybe not.  In World War II, were the Allies fighting just to fight?  Being mean to the Axis powers by fighting back?  Not in the least.  They were fighting to protect the lives, and freedoms of the oppressed.  They were fighting to restore peace.  Our feet keep us standing, steady, and help us move forward.  So if we know we are in the battle to bring good news and peace to those the enemy is holding, we will not be shaken or unsteady, we can keep moving forward, and advancing His kingdom of peace.  
• Shield of Faith - When we carry a shield, it protects us from what is trying to attack us.  It can even be used to protect those who are fighting with us.  When we continue to have faith, it protects us from the enemy's attacks because we are trusting that God is on our side and will protect us.  Romans 10:17 says, "So then, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ."   (NIV) So, to strengthen your shield, stay in the Word, and listen to the messages you receive there.  
• Helmet of Salvation - A helmet protects our head, which is obviously going to be our thoughts.  But why salvation?  2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.   Philippians 2:12 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed - not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence - continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.   The helmet of salvation is not referring to salvation of the soul from hell.  It is talking about salvation from being destroyed by the enemy, made useless in your work for God by the attacks and damage you receive in battle.  So, to succeed in the battle, to be saved, healthy and strong for the next battle, we need to be taking every thought captive, stay in the Word, being vigilant, so that we are working out our salvation in the midst of the battle.  

When you put all these pieces of armor together, a belt to keep us from getting tripped up and distracted, a breastplate to protect our hearts, boots to keep us standing strong and moving forward, a shield to protect ourselves and others, and a helmet to ensure we remain healthy for all the battles to come, what an amazing picture God has given us!  And what amazing provisions God gave us.  He knew we would face battles, and he provided exactly what we would need to be protected in the battle, because he loves us that much.  

Something to bring us joy, every day! 

Let It Rain

Tonight, on our way home from work, Jamie and I kept hearing radio announcements of a storm on the way.  We mostly ignored them.  After all, this is Texas, and they don't have rain here like we had in Virginia.  My daddy calls Virginia storms 'gullywashers'. They last for hours, they almost always have dramatic thunder and lightning, and they are completely wonderful. 

I love rain. Maybe it's the Irish and Scottish genes floating around in my DNA, but I've always loved weather that is generally considered 'bad' weather.  There is something about a rain coat and rubber rain boots, with a big happy umbrella that just makes me adventurous.  Or, alternatively, a really good rain storm is a perfect opportunity to 'opt out' for a while, curl up with a book and a cup of tea, and just stay inside and listen. 

There haven't been many of those days since we moved.  And I've sorely  missed them. 

But just as we got almost home, maybe 1/2 mile from our house, it started.  A drop here or there, not even sprinkling, so much as dripping!  But huge, FAT drops.....And after another couple blocks, some of the 'drops' would bounce on the pavement!  Hail starting.....By the time we got home, we pulled into the carport under a torrential downpour! Oh, glorious rain!!!

I sat inside listening for a while, then invited Jamie to come with me out on my porch swing.  Porches in Texas are made wide enough that the heat of the summer sun can never reach the house.  Centuries before air conditioning, it's all they had to cool their homes, and it's a very typical design feature, now.  My house is no different.  So we sat on the front porch, under the tin roof, listening to the rain.  We'd only been out there a few minutes when.....

Thunder! A huge flash of lightning lit up the entire sky in my front yard, bright as day, and then seconds later, the thunder came.  But it came in a way I have never heard before, and in a way I don't think I will ever get tired of!  Our house sits in a valley between to ridgelines of the Texas hill country.  So the thunder started on one end of the ridge, and rolled down the valley all the way to the other end of the ridge line!  And then echoed back!  I have heard the term rolling thunder, but in my life up to now, that only referred to drivers on a NASCAR track!!  This was literal and dramatic rolling. Thunder.  I was so awed, we stayed out there, by now getting quite cold, just so I could hear it one more time before we came in.  I know I will spend many nights out on my porch swing, listening to the thunder roll by. 

The plants needed the rain.  The tiny new little dogwoods and redbuds my family got me to remind me of Virginia need the rain.  The dry creekbed behind my house needs the rain.  But I needed the rain, too.  What a soothing sound for my soul.  What an absolute joy. 

I am reminded today of my very favorite Psalm, in experiencing the power and glory of the storm: 

O Lord, our Lord,
How majestic is Your name in all the earth,
Who has set Your glory above the heavens!
2 From the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have established strength
Because of Your adversaries,
To make the enemy and the revengeful cease.

3 When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers,
The moon and the stars, which You have ordained;
4 What is man that You take thought of him,
And the son of man that You care for him?
5 Yet You have made him a little lower than the angels,
And You crown him with glory and majesty!
6 You make him to rule over the works of Your hands;
You have put all things under his feet,
7 All sheep and oxen,
And also the beasts of the field,
8 The birds of the heavens and the fish of the sea,
Whatever passes through the paths of the seas.

9 O Lord, our Lord,
How majestic is Your name in all the earth!

Heavenly Surprises

Well, I mentioned in my last post that I had lots to catch you up on.  And I mentioned that we were in Texas.  Did you catch that? 

The first thing I think I should tell you about is about our new house.  So many of my previous posts were about our home in Virginia.  And I loved it. Leaving that beautiful, 100 year old Craftsman behind, leaving the porch swing, and the view of the Chesapeake Bay was one of the hardest things I've ever done.  As I drove away, headed for Texas, I knew I was doing what was right, what I had to do, and yet, I could feel my heart breaking as I left. 

But our loving Heavenly Father has a way of rewarding us for doing what He calls us to do.  And so I want to tell you about it. 

When I first left Virginia, I headed for Dallas.  I had a daughter and son-in-law and three precious grandsons just north of Dallas, and it was our plan to possibly stay in the Dallas area.  But we weren't sure, so as is my nature, I couldn't just wait until we were sure to look for houses.  Instead, I looked for houses all over Texas.  It is a new state to us, and I know very little about Texas.  So I didn't really know or even pay very close attention to where the homes were.  The important part was determining what we were looking for in a home, what was in our price range, and build the dream of a new life in Texas.  While I was looking, I found a few that seemed ideal.  I would save them, show them to all the family, take votes.  One in particular was a wonderful amount of land, a generous sized house, the front yard looked like a park, with so many flowers!  It already had a barn, and a playset for the grandkids, and had forest and a creek for the kids to explore.  It just seemed like exactly what we would want.  ......And it was under contract within a couple days after I found it.  Still, I had found the kind of property we were looking for, so I began to ask my Heavenly Father to provide us some home that was similar to this one, and to let us know it was the right home when we found it. 

Within a couple months, Darling Husband was offered a position.  Not in Dallas, after all, but in San Antonio.  We were kind of excited about that, since we'd visited San Antonio several years ago.  It's a beautiful city, with patriotic and amazing history, wonderful people, and a culinary heritage that is world famous.  Great place for a couple foodies like us!  We moved, settled in to an apartment while we found a house, and contacted a realtor (who happened to be an old friend I hadn't seen in decades, so that was amazing!) 

We had looked at....maybe 15-20 houses, enough that I was beginning to wonder if we'd be in an apartment forever. That's about the time our realtor said he had a house he thought we'd like to see, that it seemed to fit a lot of what we were looking for. 

As we pulled down the driveway and around the corner to the house, what was sitting there on this beautiful property, but the house!  The house I'd fallen in love with months before, in Dallas.  The house everyone in my family had already been in love with.  The house I thought would be perfect.  The house I asked God for. 

I can hear you now, "But you said it went under contract?"  Yep.  It was.  It was under contract for several months before the contract fell through, and it came back on the market just in time for us to find it.  A wonderful gift from a loving Father. 

So I guess you think my everyday joy today is my house.  Well, I do love my new house.  We are slowly getting acquainted, I'm slowly learning her quirks, and I'm sure one day, I'll love her as much as I loved my Craftsman on the bay. She even has a porch swing, although the view is very different. But today, my everyday joy is my wonderful Heavenly Father, who loves us so much more than we know, and gives us so much more than we deserve. 

My everyday joy today is Matthew 7:11.  If you then, full of your sin nature, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in Heaven give all good things to His children who ask Him?    Isn't that a joyful thought, indeed! 

Fates and Friends

Today is 12th night.  January 5 of a new year. So much has happened in my life, I can't even take the time right now to catch you up.  But today, one of my dearest friends messaged me, asking if I would read the first excerpt of a book she's starting.  Will I??? What an honor!  The fledgling beginnings of her book are here on Blogger, so I'm going to try to link them to my page, so you can read them, too.  Because my friend has lived through so much, and her book is going to be so amazing!  I am so proud of you, Nancy!  I'll look forward to reading the rest.

But it was fateful that she would ask me to come to Blogger to read her blog on this day.  Because just two days ago, I sat down with my new planner for a new year, and wrote down in black and white (ok, blue and white, but you know what I mean...)  my goals for the coming year.  I know, I know....'New Year's Resolutions'....the ones everyone makes.....the ones everyone has broken by Groundhog's Day.  I think of mine differently.  I never look at them as 'do or die', 'succeed or fail', 'ultimate life change' kind of resolutions.  I look at them more as 'Here's where you could have done better last year.  Here's what needs to improve by the end of this year. '  And even if  I'm not 100% gung-ho, faithful to every one of them, if I look back at the end of the year, and I can honestly say, 'Hey!  I actually did improve in that area!', then you know what?  I give myself a tiny pat on the back, and a little grace, and we call that one a win.  Does that make me lazy?  Does it make me half-hearted?  I don't think so.  I think it's accepting the personality God gave me, and working - in the way that works for me to make it better.

But back to my planner....I sat down two days ago and wrote in my planner that I was going to try to write something every day.  I'm working on two books.  I have a blog.  I have a lot of relatives who live far away.  I have friends who live far away.  Maybe every day won't be work on my book - although I hope to finish one of them this year.  Maybe every day won't be a letter to a friend.  Maybe every day won't be a new blog post.  But if I work on writing something, my book will get closer to finished.  My blog will revive. My friends and family will know how often I think of them, and how much I love them.  Just the tiny practice of writing every day will improve so much of what I feel are insurmountable goals! 

So it seemed like fate when Nancy brought me to Blogger, and I realized it was exactly one year ago today that I made my last post here on my blog.  A whole year.  A whole year in which, I'll be honest, I often struggled to find the Everyday Joy.  A year in which so much seemed to be going wrong, so many decisions seemed to be the wrong ones.  So much sadness and pain enveloped my soul that some days it was hard to even breathe.  But it was also a year in which many wonderful things happened, many successes were enjoyed, many blessings bestowed.  And a year in which my Darling Husband often encouraged me to restart my blog, because he knows I need to focus more on the Everyday Joys, and not so much on the stuff in between.  Don't we have enough of the stuff in between without focusing on it to attract more?

So, dear reader, here I am again, asking you to give me grace one more time, to join me on this new adventure in a new place, in a new situation, which I'm sure will bring new joys I will love sharing with you in this new year and new decade!

New place, you ask?  Yes, friend,  here's just a teaser on all we have to catch up on....We're in Texas!

But for today,  I'll just end with this...Thank you, thank you Nancy, for being my everyday joy today, for being a dear, sweet friend, and for being a reminder from God today of my New Year's Resolution to write every day.  

Happy New Year!

So many times, we make resolutions at this time of year and before February1, we've forgotten all about them. It's even become a sort of joke in our society. But it's made me think about what kind of people that makes us, and what that says about our society, and more importantly, our own sense of honor and integrity.
Am I a person of integrity? Do I do what I say I'm going to do? Am I the same person around my friends and family and co-workers that I am when NO ONE is watching?
I think we all tend to not keep our word, to a certain extent....especially to ourselves.
"I'm going to get the laundry finished today."
"I'm only going to watch one episode of this show on Netflix."
"I'll get the dishes done during the commercials."
"I'm going to start going to the gym."
"I'm going to spend more time with my husband/wife/kids."
"I'm going to spend more time studying the Bible."
"I'm going to spend more time in prayer."
Maybe we say these out loud to our spouse or friends. Maybe they are just silent promises we make to ourselves.
But if we don't keep them, it effects our integrity, and our self-image.
So I don't know if you set a New Years Resolution or not. I set two, personally.
But even if you didn't, let's ALL work on keeping our own, everyday promises to ourselves, and learning to be and do what we say we are.

That way, 2019 will be full of the everyday joy of knowing we are people of our word, people with personal integrity who can hold their heads high in any adversity.

Happy 2019, everyone!!

New Beginnings

Oh, my goodness.  I look at the last date on my blog here, and it was more than 2 years ago.  TWO YEARS.  So much has happened in two years.  So many things I could have....should have...been sharing.  But as sometimes happens, life got away from me, and I forgot to look at the joy, started looking only at the challenges and struggles.  So much so that I felt I had nothing joyful to write about ever.  There have been some dark days. 

But I've been gifted some wonderful friends, and some dear family who have been there in the dark places, and kept me going.  Kept reminding me of my calling, kept reminding me of my value and my gifts and of everything I dream of accomplishing. At last, their encouragement is breaking through the shell of darkness, and light....glorious, JOYOUS light is starting to break through. 

I make no excuses for not having written for so long.  The only one I have is that I was looking in the wrong places...looking at the darkness of my troubles, rather than the Light that can blast the darkness away.  So for my first blog post in two years, I leave you this excerpt from a favorite devotional book, Jesus Calling:

"To protect your thankfulness, you must remember that you reside in a fallen world, where blessings and sorrows intermingle freely.  A constant focus on adversity defeats many Christians.  They walk through a day that is brimming with beauty and brightness, seeing only the greyness of their thoughts.  Neglecting the practice of giving thanks has darkened their minds.  How precious are My children who remember to thank Me at all times.  They can walk through the darkest days with Joy in their hearts because they know that the Light of My Presence is still shining on them.  Rejoice in this day that I have made, for I am your steadfast Companion." 

Oh, how I've needed that.  I thought you might, too. 

Crochet

A friend got a new foster baby today, and I'm really excited to crochet her a cuddly blanket for her new little angel.  Planning and starting a new blanket made me realize (again)  how much I love crochet, and how much it is part of who I am.

I started crocheting when I was 8 or 9 years old.  We had gone to visit in the tiny town in southwest Illinois where my grandparents lived, and I guess all my cousins were busy with something or other, because I was 'stuck' at home with Grandma, with nothing to do but watch her create an intricate and beautiful doily.  I loved watching Grandma crochet.  Her hook would move so quickly over and through the yard or thread.  And I don't recall ever seeing her use a pattern.  I saw patterns around her house, so maybe she did, but it seemed to me, at that young age, that the blankets, slippers, ponchos, scarfs and doilies just appeared magically as if her hook were some sort of magic wand.

At last I was overcome with wonder, and said to her, 'I want to learn to crochet.'  Quite matter-of-factly, I had just decided that this was something interesting and valuable, and I wanted to know how to do the magic for myself.  She refused.  "No." she said, "You're not big enough."  Looking back on it, I know now that she must have known how much that would bother me.  As the youngest of 17 cousins, I was often being told I was too little to be included in...whatever the other cousins were doing.  So I repeated, "Grandma!  I want to learn how to crochet!  Will you show me?"  Here is where my Grandmother's child-rearing genius becomes evident, because what she did was straight out of 'Reverse Phychology 101'!  "Nope.  Teaching you to crochet would take all afternoon, and I never knew a little girl willing to sit still all afternoon! Well, I'd even bet you an ice-cream cone you couldn't sit here all afternoon for me to teach you!"  So, determined to prove her wrong, and win myself an icecream cone in the process, I sat.  And she taught me the 4 or 5 basic stitches common to every crochet pattern.  When we were done, we walked a few blocks down the street to the store, where I got the ice cream cone she had bet me!

The next afternoon, she had me make a square, which probably was more of an irregular polygon, but she seemed very proud of it, and tucked it in her drawer full of all the potholders she had crocheted.  I was very pleased with myself.  The following afternoon, she taught me how to read a pattern, and helped me follow a pattern to make a simple, coaster-sized doily, which later became a tablecloth in my doll house.

From such humble and beloved memories, I continued.  I have been crocheting for several decades at this point, and have graduated to thinking up my own patterns, and adapting the ones I read.  It's as much a favorite passtime as reading or playing the piano.  Sometimes, when I'm working on a project that is extra-special, or extra-challenging, I would swear I can feel Grandma sitting next to me, looking over my shoulder, checking my stitches.  And I'll tell you a secret, if you promise not to tell anyone.  Sometimes when it seems she's near, I talk to her.  I still miss her, even though she passed away when I was in high school.  But when I'm crocheting, I know she's still there.  If not in person, in my stitches, the stitches she lovingly taught me all those summers ago.

And I've realized something along the way.  My grandma didn't just teach me the stitches to crochet, she taught me to love it like she did.  She taught me to think about the person I'm crocheting for, and weave good wishes, happy thoughts, and love for that person into every stitch.  Maybe that's why I love it.  Because it reminds me how loved I felt wrapped up in one of Grandma's afghans, or wearing a pair of slippers made just for me.  Because it is a treasure to my heart when I hear that someone I crocheted something for cherishes it, when I know they feel loved, like I did.

Someday I hope to pass down the art of crocheting to other little girls who are my friends or granddaughters.  And I hope I pass down the love, as well.  Because that is certainly one of my everyday joys.